Forever Bound, Sesshoumaru's Poem
by SilverIceWolf
Summary: Sesshoumaru reflects on his life thus far asking the spirit of his father questions. His feelings on his early life, worry over following his father’s footsteps,doubt over who he wants to be, wondering what his father would think of him, and the pressure.


You know how it works. I don't own anything of Rumiko Takahashi's (Keh, minus merchandise, ). But I wish I did!

Okay! Well this is another poem that I was doing in- OH MY GAWD- WHAT DO YA MEAN, NOT in math class! Yup, I actually did this somewhere OTHER than math class. Mr. Sampson must be so proud of me! Hehe. Actually, I did this after reading a fanfic or three at chocolate-wolfie's/Kawaii-chan's house… at three o'clock in the morning. O.o Yes, I realize I'm weird.

GASP! Another shocker! This poem wasn't modeled after a song! AMAZING I TELL YOU, AMAZING! Yah, I'm sugar high on Jelly Beans and I'm listening to my iPod right now, so… this is what happens! LOL 

This poem is from Sesshoumaru's POV. He's reflecting on his life thus far, and asking the spirit of his father questions. This is really from my take on the character (my FAVORITE character, like, EVER!), and thus, some things you, the reader, may not agree with. I understand this. This covers his feelings after his mother died, the quick transition his father made in finding a new mate, some on InuYasha, and his worry over following in his father's footsteps. Also, his doubt over who he wants to be, wonder what his father would think of him, and the pressure he feels. I think this is a pretty good summarization of Sesshoumaru's inner thoughts, read for yourself! Please review, I think this is my fav. poem yet (also the longest! Woohoo!)! Enjoy!

**Forever Bound Sesshoumaru's Poem**

How can you hope to understand?

You know nothing

I am not the man you think I am

How could you try to figure me out?

I am not so simple

Funny

How one night

One moment in time

Can change so much

Why should it affect me so?

Why should it mould who I am

My being

My very essence

Shut out

Forgotten

Did I ever matter to you?

You restart your life

I am still here

Can you hear me?

Destined to follow in your footsteps

Destined to be great

Such a heavy burden

No word shall I speak

I will not complain

I will make you proud

Someday

Somehow

Why did you leave?

Why did you throw away what could have been

Why did you abandon me like this?

Did you know what was to pass?

Did you ever care?

Did it matter?

This is not the path I choose to take

I can never be like you

You left me here

All alone

This is too much

But I shall say nothing

There is nothing I can do

Years of silence

I say nothing

I am empty inside

This is not who I once was

I am different now

Would you recognize me?

Would you be proud?

I still do not understand

How could you be so weak?

How could you leave me?

Things could have been different

I never really knew you

Did you ever know me?

Now I try to understand

The pieces won't fit together

There is something I am missing

Time passes ever so slowly

Slower and slower

Painful

Empty

Bound by duty

Bound by honor

But what honor is there

This is not me

Must I be someone I am not

Did you feel the same?

I'll never know

I shut it out

What is the point?

What has passed is gone

Like sand washing away with the tides

Cold

Ruthless

Arrogant

Uncaring

Unloving

Distant

This is not me

I have no choice

This is what I must be

I want to brake away

I am trapped

Bound by imaginary bonds

Bound by what I must be

Did you ponder these things too?

Did you feel as I do?

As time moves past

I think of you

Did you ever love her?

She died

It hurt me so much

I should not have cried back then

I was young

I was young when _she_ came

She was to replace what I lost

What you lost

But you forgot

You forgot her

Did you ever really love her?

Did you ever really love me?

Or was it all an act?

Were you bound as I am?

You made a sacrifice

Back then I called it weak

As I do now

But was it?

You died for her

For your son

Only half of the greatness you'd become

Would you have done the same for me?

What would you have thought of him?

What would you think of him now?

He will never become what you were

He never can

Wasted

Lost

Disgraceful

Would you think so as well?

I am the only one

But would you prefer him over me?

Have I done your memory well?

I try

But I never really knew you

In my silence

I have come to see

Things the way you saw them

Slowly

I begin to understand

I wish you were here with me

I think we would have been closer now

I will never know

Sometimes

I know

I need you

I need your help

The help you gave me once

When I was younger

Yes

I think I realize now

You did care

But now it's too late

So I will try

For you, Father

I will try to measure up to you

I can be the man you were

But do I want to be?

We are different

You and I

I want to do you right

Can I still be me?

I shall go to him

I will teach him in my own way

I think you would have wanted that

So I will try

To do as you would

And still be me

I don't want to make the same mistakes that you did

But will I make more in the process?

I must learn from you

Learn from your mistakes

Learn from your achievements

But were your mistakes and achievements the same ones that I see?

I shall never really know

So I help him

In my own way

I never really wanted him dead

He is half of you

And in part

Half of me

He is kin to us both

Does he ever think of the things I do?

Would he ever have to worry?

Truly feel this way?

I would not wish this on him

So I protect him

Teach him

As you did for me

But one day I will not be here

I will someday meet you

And one day

I can ask you

Did you ask your father these things?

Tedious, almost over analyzed questions

Things that tore at you

Yet you were forbidden to swipe them away

Because that is who you were born to be

Because that is what you must be

Were you once like me?

Forever bound

So, whatcha think? Reviews, please!

SilverIceWolf


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